This, in a Marriage website? Oh, yes!

I read this from a recommendation from another MB poster six years ago. I had just discovered how ingrained Disrespectful Judgments were in the way I communicated. To me, this book is the antidote. Showed me how to inject respect into my marriage and all my relationships, including my sons.

Would love to hear what impact this book has had on other lives. It had a key role in saving my marriage.

LA

well, all I can say is that since I read it my D7 has had only 1 tantrum, rather than the 1 or 2 a week - and that was because I was in a hurry and chose not to take the time to use what I had learned from it - wish I had!

My D is now more open with me and more cuddly....or maybe I am more open and cuddly with her...anyway: more cuddles.

I read it at a time when I needed it for the kids. I know I have used it all over the place and lots and lots in the playground, but I think I might go back and read it again with marriage in mind.

It is a very easy read...

I recommended it today for a group of mums who were discussing "sibling bullying" after a radio show.

LA, you recommended this book to me, and I loved it! Helped my parenting, my partnering, and my self-talk.

LA, I also read it on your recommendation, and it's changed the way I parent.

Between Parent and Child website

I see I commented on tantrums of my then 7yo above. Great book. Website looks a little clumsy....

can't believe the way it helped me interact with my D...in fact I might just read it again....

Wonder what I did with it....I picked up an old 2nd hand one for a couple of quid - it was very well worth the spend

I just re-read it last week on vacation, and what an eye-opening, life-changing book. Likes Squeaks said, a very easy read, and I could relate to all the examples. Re-reading it, I can see how it has changed my life already, and I see more room for growth, specifically in my relationship with my mom. Great for anyone who would like more peace and mindfulness in their life, or has any part in their life that would benefit from letting go of the rope.

Specifically I liked the part about providing empathy as opposed to jumping to problem-solving. My default is very much to jump to "how to keep this from happening again" when so often things in my life find their own equilibrium again on their own without having to think or work through it. For example my mom has a lot of health issues that pop up, and I'll worry about her, when the issue is already working its way out of her system.

This week my kids have really bad colds, that they got from me, and I rearranged their schedule with their dad so they could be with me and I could bring them to the doctor and make them tea and soup, when all that would have happened or not happened on its own anyway. I have this habit of trying to get through the next crisis and wait for things to return to normal, but normal includes colds and flus and forgotten homework and missed deadlines and wasted money and all the things that make life messy.

Cat mentions getting lost in a strange city, just to reinforce that we are okay. I'm not at that point where that sounds like it would be a fun adventure, but I was on vacation with friends and family last week and did a lot less trying to co-manage and just let things unfold.

I am doing a TON of this ^^^ and my stress level is SO much lower. Basically I'm saving 100% on stress by switching to not giving a $$^&$ ! lol I know that's a funny saying, but "not my circus, not my monkeys, works for me!"

Yes, Miranda, actually I liked that one so much I say that now to myself at work all the time. It takes a village but nobody elected me village manager lol. And even when they do I can still hand that back too, especially if it's going to interfere with me doing what I need to do.

Another idea from the book I really liked, in the spirit of it takes a village, was that when you take your kids places, stop managing them, let the people you are visiting set the rules for their own homes. I read this as we were staying in a new friend's home. So I didn't get on the kids about what temperature they set the AC at for example, or how they kept the room they were staying in. I just made one comment at the beginning that if they are an easy and fun guest they would be invited back, and if not, they may not be invited back. They did perfectly, not leaving their clothes in the bathroom or any of the stuff they do at home. And if they didn't do so good that would have been good practice in natural consequences.

I'd really love to read it again but I just can't remember who I loaned it to, maybe I'll have to rebuy it. I think I shall have to start my own library and keep a record of where they are.

My wish is for everyone in the world to read this book.

ST, that's one of the wonderful things about Ebooks! You always know RIGHT where they are!!