That said, I have a slightly different take than most. I don't think you are grieving your mother's passing. Why would you grieve over that? She was horrid to you most of the time. Instead, I think you are grieving the death of hope. The loss of hope that some day she might come to her senses and apologize and ask for forgiveness for her awful behavior. Now you know there will be no apology and no request for forgiveness. Not that you expected it to happen. But there it was, a tiny shard of hope, buried deep within you. I can imagine the loss of that faint, slim hope (notwithstanding how very faint and very slim it was) feels like something cherished has been ripped from inside you. THAT is a death worth grieving over.