It's funny that you say that "He was trying to die." I always say that. It's my trademark at work.
I find that when it comes to extubation, patients know best. I've had a handful of patients pull their own tube out, and they have never been wrong. He's so much better off without a trach etc, he's well on his way. Recovery will be long, he's decinditioned and grumpy and whiny, but that's how men ALWAYS are. I'm happy for you and your family.