Alcoholism and depression are entirely different.

It is a REASON for an inability to act and handle business in some cases. You obviously were able to work through your problems. There are many variables that come into play with depression. There are decidedly different levels of depression.

Having been trained to understand depression....having lived through it for a period myself and knowing that pharmacological and talk therapies are often times ineffective, I know that mental health professionals would balk at much of what has been said here. I have a rather unique perspective on this stuff. I worked as a police officer and would at least every other week take a body to the morgue of someone that should have, by the logic being put forth here, just gotten over their depression. I also worked for Pfizer selling Zoloft and inasmuch had to spend a lot of time in training and psychiatrist offices.

I don't base my views on giving her husband a free pass. Anyone that knows me, knows MEDC, gets that I don't hand those out freely. I can be very harsh on people not pulling their weight. In this case, we do not yet know if that is the case.
YOUR history of depression has little to nothing in common with OH's husband until proven otherwise.

OH has the right to say screw it and walk anytime she pleases. I thought the purpose of the thread was to offer help. That is what I am trying to do. I am using experience and knowledge to guide OH in a fashion that I believe to be correct. I am not going to use words that attack her husbands character until it is proven that his lack of motivation is not a result of this terrible disease.

Don't go shaking the [Bleep!] tree and expect an angel to fall out.

Liars lie and cheaters cheat...know it and don't be surprised. Protect yourself.