Forgive me for projecting. My 1st H went through a period after he messed up his career and literally could not get hired in that career again. He wouldn't flip burgers (even as a manager) because it was "beneath him". Meanwhile (this was before I was making the $$ I am now) we were some $600 short on the bills every month. I could NOT get him to see how much it was killing me to be thinking about trying to find a 2nd job while I'm having to put my baby in daycare because he wouldn't even watch her, and he's sitting on his rump.

And of course, then I go and marry #2 who has now been failing to contribute anything significant to the finances. frown But at least I'd become self-sufficient to handle everything on my own. Until of course he convinced me to take on further debt on his behalf. frown (Yes, I am an idiot sometimes.)

OH, not trying to t/j, just trying to point out that once they start this nonsense, you lose respect for them. How can you have a marriage where you don't respect your H? I will never understand how a man can live with himself sitting on his rump while his wife is struggling to keep from losing the house. UNACCEPTABLE.

Frankly, if I were you, I'd put it to him point blank that he needs to bring in x$ a month starting THIS MONTH, and you don't care if he sells plasma or prostitutes himself to do it. Give him exactly ONE MONTH to bring in that x$ or he's out the door, whatever legal maneuvering that takes.

Ok, I'm kidding about the prostitution.

Mostly. wink

Let me not be so vain to think I'm the sole author of my victories and and a victim of my defeats. -- ze frank