Writing a Non-Traditional Wedding Ceremony
First of all, Iíd like to clarify where we were coming from. We come from families with varying degrees of adherence to Catholic and Presbyterian faiths, but my husband and I are not religious. And by that I donít mean, ďwell weíre sort of [insert denomination] but donít go to church or anything.Ē We donít believe in god, period. I donít even like the words atheist or non-believer, because it makes me feel like Iím deficient in some way. But this is just to provide some context; nothing in what Iíve said or am about to say is intended to be any kind of judgment on those who do have faith and follow a religion, or have faith but donít necessarily follow a religion, or donít have faith but still plan to include biblical or other religious aspects in their ceremonies.
Iíd also like to say that YES, the obvious has been pointed out to me, that as far from religious as we tried to make our ceremony, the shell of it comes directly from Christian roots. Yes, you can groom a dog to look like a panda, but itís still a dog. (Iím not sure if that metaphor works but Iím excited about the excuse to share that link)
FINDING A STRUCTURE
Honestly we would not have gotten too far without our officiant. The internet is surprisingly unhelpful regarding ceremony structure and content, and Iíve gotten to the point where, if the internets canít help me, I have no idea what to do (Iím gonna come out and admit that I wasnít even fully aware that I could THINK for myself, before I came across APW). Luckily the internet did lead us to our officiant (thank you WeddingWire), and she helped us from there. In the interest of giving good advice, I would say you definitely want to shop around when youíre looking for a stranger to perform your wedding, and make sure they will take the time to get to know you. In the interest of full disclosure, Iíll tell you we spoke with two candidates, and the one we chose was based on a telephone conversation (we didnít meet her in person until 2 weeks before the ceremony). We had a good feeling about her approach, and it worked out Ė but it was a bit of a gamble...