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**Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating**
#38676
12/21/10 01:52 PM
12/21/10 01:52 PM
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Joined: Aug 2010
Posts: 3,442
Ace
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Many can't eat when they get upset.
Not me!
When things get tough I fight the urge to grab food with an entitled feeling of "I deserve this!" That's part of the reason I gained about 100 pounds over a 20 year span (and regained 50 of the 80 I lost between 2002 and 2007).
While reading TimeHeals' excellent post about changing past/present/future positive attitudes and actions, I was reminded of my Emotional Eating habits.
I don't really care to delve into the reasons unless they are needed to build a foundation for changing my mental attitude.
TH mentioned having a PMA = Positive Mental Attitude, a term I am familiar with from the many motivational classes and workshops I've taken.
How can I change 40 + years of having a Negative Mental Attitude regarding my urges to grab comfort food when things are challenging?
Anyone else have this problem? (I realize that many are just the opposite and have inadvertantly lost tons of weight on the unhealthy but often inevitable Infidelity Diet, which could be an interesting topic for another thread.)
All brainstorming ideas are welcome....even if you don't have a specific solution to offer.
For me, getting control of this instinctive Emotional Eating habit will greatly improve my health and ultimately our marriage. (And if I'm not the only one with this problem, others will be helped, too!)
Thanks, Ace
We're overcoming decades of marital dysfunction including abuse, passive aggression, gas-lighting & infidelity (both of us). Our Weird and Ongoing Story
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Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating**
[Re: Ace]
#38708
12/21/10 02:47 PM
12/21/10 02:47 PM
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Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 137
Rural Idiot
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Ace, I have dropped 60+ over the last 9 months and have a few ideas...
I found that cutting out sugar and bread took away cravings. The more processed sugar I ate the more I wanted...some was never enough.
Bread, especially white rolls, french and italian bread, etc. gave me sugar like spikes...multigrain was better, but Triscuit crackers, etc. stopped that and fed my cravings for carbs without being so immediately digestable.
I have a diet soup recipe that I love. It is basically a chicken stock soup base with black beans, diced tomatoes, spinach, minced garlic, halapeno peppers, olive oil, a carrot, pulled chicken from baked or roasted chicken, and fried onions to give a french onion soup flavor. You add grated parmesian or romano cheese for some calcium and to help slightly cut down the hot from the peppers.
It satisfies all the vitamin and fiber needs while raising metabolism with peppers and adding protein from chik and beans. I eat it twice or more a day and it lasts between meals stopping my cravings.
I also started eating yogurt again and adding whole flax seeds..your body uses energy to break down the outside kernel, and it gives fiber and omega 3 fatty acids you need. The yogurt helps digestion and gives calcium.
Point being, my emotional needs for food aren't triggered so much if my body HAS THE GOOD STUFF ALREADY IN IT....
I reach for a Ricola cough drop instead once in a while. The sugar rush doesn't happen when the drops last so long and it reminds me that this is NOT candy.....that is is MEDICINE for my soul. (my visualization)
Finally, I exercise morning and night...Hell, I'm alone now, who is to say what I can and can't do anymore and when. I don't have a set schedule for that yet, that might help..
I noticed that I was able to keep from feeling so lonely when I watched an exercise video instead of simply working out to some tunes..(plus the ladies in the videos are an incentive to try and get there again someday).
And yes, I use ladies fitness routines and read women's self help articles. It is fascinating to read a different perspective but I can be caught up in it too much, too....hell, read my posts..
Thanks for trying, folks...but this pig is way past lipstick.
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Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating**
[Re: Squeaky Tree]
#38739
12/21/10 03:59 PM
12/21/10 03:59 PM
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Joined: Sep 2010
Posts: 915
kilted_thrower
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Ace, the only magic bullet when it comes to over eating is simply not to do it. I know this is a "duh" statement, but it's absolutely true.
If you're going to over eat, it's time to start changing what you eat. Get the junk food out of the house. Get the breads out of the house unless you're eating breads like Ezekial brand.
I can match eating consumption with the best of them out there. XL pizza-check, I can eat that. 1.5 pound burger and fries-check, I can eat that. 1/2 gallon of ice cream-check, not a problem, I can eat that.
So what's in my fridge? Lots of beef, chicken, vegetables, turkey bacon, olives, and frozen fruits. Now we do have some fruit snacks and crackers for the kids but most of that stuff I just don't like to eat anyway unless I have crazy beer munchies.
If you eat 'clean' 90 percent of the time, the other 10 percent won't matter near as much and isn't going to show on that waistline.
One of the problems is people really have no idea what it means to 'eat healthy'. They think vegetables and fruits...stuff like that but really have no idea how to put it together. And they're deluded into thinking that if something says Whole Wheat it's good for you.
Overeating? Don't do it. Seriously, you have will power. If you're going to over eat, change what you have access to. Wanna lose weight? Seek out bodybuilders or bodybuilding websites. I guarrantee you no one has a better grasp on nutrition for physique purposes than those guys/gals.
Some people are just wired for success. I had no choice when it came to being great. I just am great. --K. Powers
Somebody may beat me, but they are going to have to bleed to do it. --Prefontaine
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Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating**
[Re: kilted_thrower]
#38877
12/21/10 09:35 PM
12/21/10 09:35 PM
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Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 9,381 TX
CajunRose
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I am addicted to cake, cookies, and ice cream. I had gestational diabetes, when I changed my diet I ate more, was never hungry, and LOST weight while 7 months pregnant (and without exercising at all - I was also on bed rest). Food diaries realllly help me. For my health issues, I had to concentrate on sugars, not calories. If I write down everything I eat and look at the sugar numbers, I can always tell if I'm on the right track. If my sugar numbers are in line, then I am usually not feeling hungry during the day. I stopped buying cookies, cakes, brownie mixes, candy, ice cream, potato chips, and other comfort foods. The nutritionist told me to make sure I ate more protein or fats, especially if I was eating anything with carbs. I was also instructed to eat a morning and afternoon snack every day. All of that helps control your sugar swings. I ate a lot of cheese and crackers, a lot of eggs on whole-wheat English muffins, and started eating more veggies than fruits (cucumbers were a great crunchy snack for me). I also found "legal" ways to satisfy my cravings - fruit popsicles, mini containers of ice cream so I couldn't eat a whole quart, etc. And I discovered that pizza and burritos are actually pretty good for you in the grand scheme of things  If I'm eating properly, when I'm caught in my head and have the impulse to reach for food, I realize that I'm not hungry and can sometimes stop the craving just by reminding myself that I'm full. If that doesn't work, I have to get active - go outside and go for a walk, put on music and dance around the living room, pace around the room and call a friend, or SOMETHING to get the edge off the stress. And sometimes I still lose the urge and reach for my comfort food A few slip-ups here and there are okay; no one is perfect.
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Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating**
[Re: Rural Idiot]
#39139
12/22/10 05:40 PM
12/22/10 05:40 PM
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Joined: Aug 2010
Posts: 3,442
Ace
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Excellent points, RI. I will take this part to heart:
Point being, my emotional needs for food aren't triggered so much if my body HAS THE GOOD STUFF ALREADY IN IT....
Excellent other ideas, too ST, CR, FM and KT but no time to respond right now. I will be back to comment more sooner or later.
Thanks, Ace
We're overcoming decades of marital dysfunction including abuse, passive aggression, gas-lighting & infidelity (both of us). Our Weird and Ongoing Story
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Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating**
[Re: Squeaky Tree]
#39232
12/22/10 07:55 PM
12/22/10 07:55 PM
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Ace
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Sounds like you have the best of both worlds, ST. Just kidding.  Looking at your scenario, it seems that you reward yourself with treats when you're sick and tired and working hard. Then when you're stressed and anxious, you lose your appetite. I guess the answer for me if I was in your shoes would be to find good healthy treats that I really like. Then, eliminate all stress and anxiety from my life so I keep my appetite for the healthy snacks I eat when I'm .....uh.....sick and tired. Wait a minute, what's wrong with this picture?????  Seriously, ST, I think I know what you mean. But I've only experienced a tinge of losing my appetite due to stress or anxiety twice, I think. I kinda wish it would happen more often and wonder what that's like. I know, I know.... bad thinking! But I still wonder.... Ace
We're overcoming decades of marital dysfunction including abuse, passive aggression, gas-lighting & infidelity (both of us). Our Weird and Ongoing Story
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Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating**
[Re: kilted_thrower]
#39238
12/22/10 08:11 PM
12/22/10 08:11 PM
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Ace
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Thanks for the pep talk, KT. I know what to do but I often need this kind of inspiration to do what I know to do. I guess that's kinda why I started this thread. It will be good for me and others to get tips on playing the head games we need to win in order to quit digging our graves with our forks, spoons and fingers. So, KT, have you ever been more than 50 pounds overweight with flab and blubber (not muscle mass)? Sorry for the TMI but it's an honest question. I weigh far more than people think I do because I really do have large bones and exceptional muscle mass. It's the stuff on the outside of those bones and muscles that need to be eliminated. And I know that it starts in the head. Thoughts. It's what I used to lose those 80 pounds in 5 years....control my thoughts. I think that one of my problems is that now, years later, my age makes things harder than it was when I was peri-menopausal. <sigh> My doctor did say that my weight loss greatly diminished my menopause symptoms. It's harder now than it was before...some of the things I did before don't work so well now. I will buckle down and do this again by building the right thoughts and working to control my self-talk because I have all that I need at my disposal: 1. Ability to move without pain. CHECK!  2. Resources to get healthy food. CHECK!  3. Support from those who care about me. CHECK!  4. Conscious ability to control the stuff that goes in my mouth. CHECK!  5. Sub-conscious support. UNCHECK. This is why I started this thread as I lack this so far. At least that's the only excuse I can think of for now. Thanks for the KITB, KT...please stick around!  Ace
Last edited by Ace; 12/22/10 08:13 PM.
We're overcoming decades of marital dysfunction including abuse, passive aggression, gas-lighting & infidelity (both of us). Our Weird and Ongoing Story
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Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating**
[Re: flowmom]
#40390
12/26/10 01:23 PM
12/26/10 01:23 PM
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Ace
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I tend to be an emotional eater too. I don't keep anything in my house that I would binge on, and I mostly keep "clean" food in the house. My pantry is a pretty grim place when I have the munchies  I used the Weight Watchers list of 'free foods' when I lost my 80 pounds a few years ago. 2 things changed: Weight Watchers just changed their free foods list! (Most fruits are now on it!) And my efforts in what used to work are not as effective anymore. (I used to be able to eat more 'cheat' foods daily but that habit has to go it seems.) Also, I totally agree that when I'm proactively eating good stuff (TONS of green veggies, lots of healthy protein and fat) I am less likely to eat emotionally. So, FM, what kinds of 'healthy protein and fats' do you consider part of your "proactive good stuff?" Thanks, Ace
We're overcoming decades of marital dysfunction including abuse, passive aggression, gas-lighting & infidelity (both of us). Our Weird and Ongoing Story
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Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating**
[Re: CajunRose]
#40394
12/26/10 01:47 PM
12/26/10 01:47 PM
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Ace
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I am addicted to cake, cookies, and ice cream. I had gestational diabetes, when I changed my diet I ate more, was never hungry, and LOST weight while 7 months pregnant (and without exercising at all - I was also on bed rest). Can you box and market your method of eating more, never being hungry, not exercising, staying in bed and still losing weight? Pregnant or not, that sounds like a winner!  Food diaries realllly help me. For my health issues, I had to concentrate on sugars, not calories. If I write down everything I eat and look at the sugar numbers, I can always tell if I'm on the right track. If my sugar numbers are in line, then I am usually not feeling hungry during the day. Thanks for reminding me. I have a form for a food diary that worked for me when I got started years ago. I will get it out today. THANKS! You're right. That is a very helpful simple thing.....I often avoided eating stuff because I didn't want to have to write it down. I stopped buying cookies, cakes, brownie mixes, candy, ice cream, potato chips, and other comfort foods. The nutritionist told me to make sure I ate more protein or fats, especially if I was eating anything with carbs. I was also instructed to eat a morning and afternoon snack every day. All of that helps control your sugar swings. I ate a lot of cheese and crackers, a lot of eggs on whole-wheat English muffins, and started eating more veggies than fruits (cucumbers were a great crunchy snack for me). I also found "legal" ways to satisfy my cravings - fruit popsicles, mini containers of ice cream so I couldn't eat a whole quart, etc. And I discovered that pizza and burritos are actually pretty good for you in the grand scheme of things  Great tips. I did much of the same when losing weight. But since it was less expensive to make 'my own' 100 calorie baggies for snacks, I quit buying the pre-measured munchies. The only problem is that now, I find myself measuring out the 100 calorie amounts....but eating the rest after only making a few packets.  If I'm eating properly, when I'm caught in my head and have the impulse to reach for food, I realize that I'm not hungry and can sometimes stop the craving just by reminding myself that I'm full. If that doesn't work, I have to get active - go outside and go for a walk, put on music and dance around the living room, pace around the room and call a friend, or SOMETHING to get the edge off the stress. And sometimes I still lose the urge and reach for my comfort food A few slip-ups here and there are okay; no one is perfect. Unfortunately for me, those "few slip-ups" often lead to massive binging and giving up 'until the next day'. When many of those types of days are strung together (like for me this past week), changes need to happen. Last night after our family Christmas dinner, the kids (ages 18-31) set up a virtual program called "Just Dance" or something like that. It was a contest between dancers who help controllers in their hands that relayed their movements to a centrally placed sensor and points were earned by matching the dancers moves with the dancers on the screen. They wanted me to join them but I had eaten so much I had to refrain. As we were leaving, I heard the 21 year old bemoan the fact that her nearly 80 year old granny (a former elementary PE teacher for 35 years) had beaten her score!  I think the game belongs to my DD so I'll see if she can set it up here this week. I have to work Monday and Tuesday but will have another 5 day week-end and I am planning to follow all these great tips this week. What kinds of exercises work for you? Please check back in whenever you think of more tips that help (or hurt) your healthy efforts. Thanks for all your input. Ace
Last edited by Ace; 12/27/10 01:01 AM. Reason: correct name of dance program from "Let's Dance" to "Just Dance"
We're overcoming decades of marital dysfunction including abuse, passive aggression, gas-lighting & infidelity (both of us). Our Weird and Ongoing Story
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Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating**
[Re: Ace]
#40573
12/27/10 12:54 AM
12/27/10 12:54 AM
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Joined: Sep 2010
Posts: 915
kilted_thrower
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Ace, I haven't been 50 pounds overweight before. Well, I have been overweight, it could've been 50 pounds...I don't know. I can tell you that I didn't look very good. Lots of alcohol, careless eating, no exercise=not a nice looking physique. Here's a contest I went into over this last summer. I will say the before pics of me are pretty bad as I had the contestants had a 10 day heads up on the contest and I made sure I made full use of 10 days with a lot of beer, pizza, olive oil, and butter. http://crackberry.com/60-day-blackberry-...inner-announcedThere were several hundred of us that started and when it came to voting day, there was only 4 of us left. You should've seen some of the hater posts I got from people saying my results weren't realistic and etc. Ah well, haters will hate. I gotz abz...they aint.
Some people are just wired for success. I had no choice when it came to being great. I just am great. --K. Powers
Somebody may beat me, but they are going to have to bleed to do it. --Prefontaine
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Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating**
[Re: kilted_thrower]
#40577
12/27/10 01:12 AM
12/27/10 01:12 AM
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Ace
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Ace, I haven't been 50 pounds overweight before. Well, I have been overweight, it could've been 50 pounds...I don't know. I can tell you that I didn't look very good. Lots of alcohol, careless eating, no exercise=not a nice looking physique. Here's a contest I went into over this last summer. I will say the before pics of me are pretty bad as I had the contestants had a 10 day heads up on the contest and I made sure I made full use of 10 days with a lot of beer, pizza, olive oil, and butter. http://crackberry.com/60-day-blackberry-...inner-announcedThere were several hundred of us that started and when it came to voting day, there was only 4 of us left. You should've seen some of the hater posts I got from people saying my results weren't realistic and etc. Ah well, haters will hate. I gotz abz...they aint. CONGRATULATIONS! Thanks for sharing that. what an inspiration. You and Will did a great job. (How did Will Power become your best close personal friend?...that's what I need to know!) Again, thanks for sharing KT. I know the Diet & Fitness thread went on a diet boycott until after New Years. I decided to weigh in tomorrow...it's goin' ta be ugly...and start my date with WILL on Tuesday. Maybe my H wants to join us. He runs 5 miles a day so he can keep pitching (overhand baseball) when he turns 60 next year. But we both could improve our eating habits. Appreciate your dropping in, KT. Please stick around. Our marriage will be enhanced greatly when we both can get control of our healthy habits. Ace
We're overcoming decades of marital dysfunction including abuse, passive aggression, gas-lighting & infidelity (both of us). Our Weird and Ongoing Story
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Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating**
[Re: Ace]
#43828
01/03/11 12:49 AM
01/03/11 12:49 AM
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Ace
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Raquel73 announced her ambitious goals for her weight and health on her Success Story thread. Then she asked posters what others are going to do. Rather than clutter up her fine thread I thought I'd answer here. Everyone is welcome to join in. IMVHO a healthy weight is one of the major factors in one's self esteem and other marriage aspects. I'll share my basic goals and post what worked for me in my previous attempts to lose weight; it's maintaining the loss that is very difficult. 1) Take a before weight-loss picture. I had my H take one beside our Christmas Tree today. 2) Commit to take during weight-loss pictures, not after weight-loss pictures. This healthy eating process is a never-ending life-long journey, not an event that is over once the desired weight is reached. 3) Keep my food journal like I did before. Track water intake and limit all other fluids (which is easy for me since my favorite drinks are cold, hot, or tepid water). 4) Chart my weight every day initially and then at least once a week when I've adopted proper habits in a few weeks. (For some, weighing daily sabotages them but it's an inspiration for me...and worked before so I will do it again.) 5) Work out on a regular basis at home or at Curves like I have since 2002. 6) I will find my articles and inspirational DVD I produced after losing 80 pounds and watch it. <sigh> 7) I'll post excerpts from the articles here as time allows (but now I have to go). Anyone wanna join in? All I ask is that you check in at least once a week and share something that made you mad or sad and how you got glad without reaching for food. It'll be great to collect stories and inspire each other with little and then big successes in controlling our emotional eating, reaching our healthy weight goals, and improving ourselves and our marriages. Thanks, Ace
Last edited by Ace; 01/03/11 12:54 AM. Reason: add link to Raquel's Success Story thread
We're overcoming decades of marital dysfunction including abuse, passive aggression, gas-lighting & infidelity (both of us). Our Weird and Ongoing Story
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Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating**
[Re: Ace]
#45092
01/05/11 06:55 AM
01/05/11 06:55 AM
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Joined: Dec 2010
Posts: 30
Raquel73
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Okay, Day 3 - No sugar despite it being in very tempting spot in the office!
I worked for an hour yesterday, mostly aerobic. Today I did some more aerobic, and weightlifting. I am trying to work out 6 days a week, at least an hour per day.
No more soda, diet or otherwise. I'm just drinking my crystal light and 2 cups of coffee in the morning - I absolutely refuse to give up my coffee. Today I had a hot tea in the afternoon.
Eating lots of veggies, fruits, and protein. Trying to ration the portion size. Had 2 scrambled eggs and a yogurt for breakfast. Leftover pot roast (about 4 oz) with some carrots, potatoes, and onion. Snack - 2 mozzarella chees sticks and a small pear. Dinner - homemade chicken vegetable soup. I think I done good.
I will probably weigh myself about once a week or once every 2 weeks. I really hate scales. I hate photos of me, too. Don't think I will do that until I have at least dropped a clothing size.
I am also reading more on nutrition and going more for organic products, avoiding high fructose corn syrup and going to Farmer's markets. I just watched a documentary called "Food Inc" and I really have been rethinking how and what I eat. Everyone should watch this documentary - you will be shocked when you find out what you're really eating!
We can do this!!!
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Re: **Get Mad or Sad -> Grab Food! How to Change Emotional Eating**
[Re: Ace]
#45135
01/05/11 02:29 PM
01/05/11 02:29 PM
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Why is the pre-picture important? For me, I had my H take them (in my swimsuit  ) for posterity. It was on a throw-away camera and I put it in my safe but didn't develop it until I decided to try to help others with my weight-loss testimony. The fact that those pictures were potentially available was always in the back of my mind. I was determined to create a positive comparison and it was motivation that worked for me (even though I totally understand why it might not be helpful for you.) Also, the throw-away camera film developing technology might go away soon so that might be good or bad; good because it may help you lose faster, but bad if you lose all the weight so gradually that you can't develop the comparison pictures because they've gone the way of Kodachrome and disappeared. As I mentioned, I will never take "AFTER" pictures. I think of them as "DURING" pictures...as in "during the rest of my life" pictures. If I meet my weight loss goal and think of it as done, I set myself up to regain all of the weight. (Yes, I've regained some of it back, but I'm glad I got a handle on it before I regained all 80 pounds!) Regarding "The Pain of the Re-Gain," I am seeking solutions to my Emotional Eating, which is why I regained the 50 pounds. As I find these solutions, my self image and confidence will increase and our marriage will improve even more than it has already. Thanks for being here. Ace
We're overcoming decades of marital dysfunction including abuse, passive aggression, gas-lighting & infidelity (both of us). Our Weird and Ongoing Story
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